leperskins

2002-08-11T10:24:00.000-04:00

Okay folks, I realize that I have been gone for quite some time now, and many of you may be wondering what I have been doing. Well, I decided that Toronto, Canada will be my new future home. I was on vacation in Toronto with my girlfriend for the past week. When I got back, I was swamped with work. I should be finished with all of thaqt mumbo jumbo soon, and I will be posting regularly by the end of August. Bear with me, I have not left!

2002-07-25T08:50:00.000-04:00

..uh-huh-huh!

2002-07-25T08:48:00.000-04:00

Does she need Rogaine? HAIRLESS WOMAN

2002-07-22T10:48:00.000-04:00

..Well I decided I would get back to what I am all about. Deformed and less fortunate Human Beings. As I said, I have not posted in a while because I am busy at work.

Cherubism

2002-07-21T13:35:00.000-04:00

Bert and Ernie are Gay! This Movie Proves it.

I told you. Plus, Jamie Lee Curtis is not a a Herm!

Speaking of which...
Muppet With HIV Joining 'Sesame' Cast

2002-07-21T13:18:00.000-04:00

FUCK, shIt! Blark, Mooo! heewoptwitch Br0Wnie#

2002-07-19T19:53:00.000-04:00

Okay, I'm going to say this, and I may have to repeat myself several times *twitch*. Fuck all of you that keep threatening not to visit if I don't post every few seconds. I have many other obligations including jasons mom, world domination, contributing to the delinquency of minors, looking at porn, and getting the occasional whiff of fresh air. Anyway, as you all know, half of the material I scream about is all the same...just variations...key word searches that lead to my site include deformed babies, jamie lee curtis+enlarged clitoris+ hermaphrodite, amputees, sex starved kittens and *twitch* mules, hate, sex, porn, cumming on a mothers chest...you get the idea. I will be updatig regularly within the next few weeks. However (and you would have made note of this if you read a post I left about 2 weeks ago), I am busy getting ready for an all out debaucherous trip to Canada and Chicago. I need to save money, so I got a dumb job at some retarded hippie restaurant: ORBITS. They pay well, and my coworkers are decent (I THINK THEY ALL HATE ME). *twitch* Yet, I hate the clientelle. All too fucking granola. Some lady noticed I was scratching my arm the other day and she got all help-a-fellow-human- on my irritable ass. She said, "Oh, I have some double succulant honey glow paste that may help...its all natural." Translation: "Check out this awesome hippie lotion...It doesn't work, but its all natural check it out...I am lame!" I wanted to say "No its all right...Im scratching my arm becasue I accidentally broke an IV needle there a few days ago and did not clean it up. The scab got infected but I'm fine now." So, I will post soon...come to my site anyways or the hippie gets it!

2002-07-14T15:11:00.000-04:00

..Go Janet Reno, its your birthday.

2002-07-14T11:40:00.000-04:00

I saw Cinderella and Poison play at the Nissan Pavillion this weekend (7/12/02) It was pretty damn sweet. One of my first rock n' roll albums I ever owned was the Cinderella album, Night Songs. Unfortunately, my parents being the fine upstanding folks that they were wanted to shield me from hair bands. I was like seven, so they thought bands like the Bee-Gees and Huey Lewis and The News were more suited for my delicate still underdeveloped psyche. I got the Cinderella album, and Motley Crue's Dr. Feelgood album from a friend of mine. I think he had stolen them from his dad's friend;s truck. Either way, I owned them, and I ruled.

THE SHOW

So, Cinderella kicked ass, they had minimal explosions and fireworks though. I feel this is a necessity for any hair band from the eighties and early nineties. They did rock though, and I cannot judge them on thier lack of fireworks. The singer was cool too. I always find it admirable when a lead singer plays an instrument as well. (I hate those people that cannot play any instrument, but say "yea, I'm the singer for the band"....Fuck you dude. You Suck.) Anyway, the lead singer was able to play guitar, piano and saxaphone. It was pretty sweet. I have actually purchased a compilation CD of Cinderell for my collection. I actually like their music still.

Poison was pretty sweet too. They played a whole shload of songs (Unskinny Bop, Every Rose has a Thorn, Fallen Angel, I want Action etc.) I did enjoy the show, and although they were the headliners, I still think Cinderella is much cooler. Before we were inundated with 80's heavy metal riffs we were at the entrance to the pavillion, and some associates of my friend ended showing up. They were hammered, and had come from NY because Brett Michaels had told the fans at the NY show that they could use their ticket stub to get into the show in VA. That night Brett Michaels made the same offer, he said to bring the used ticket stub from the Nissan show to their next show in Hershey, PA. Unfortunately, my homeboy Mike-Dogg had to work a fucked up shift the following day. He wanted to go. I had to work an eqully fucked shift on Sunday, and would have been home on time from the concert to sleep 2 hours. (I would have just slept at my desk though, that would heve been fine, because I would have seen Poison and Cinderella two nights in a row.) Oh, I must mention, one of the coolest things that happened at the show: In tradition of Poison and their antics, they were able to get some of the girls to take off their shirts while on some dumbass' shoulders. The Pavillion has two large screens on the side, and the cameraman would keep on focusing on one girl for a while hoping she would remover her top. Most of the girls did not, but there were some that did, and it was cool. Although breast are always cool, the main reason this ruled was becaus eit was a part of the experience. After 13 years, Poison can still get chicks to flash. Awesome.

THE CROWD

The show was definitely cool, but the crowd at a show like this is a completely different story. There was a plethora of different kinds of people. Many werte just regular folks. However, many were members of an elite class I like to call the Class of 89. Many of them were sporting old school t-shirts of Warrant and White Snake (w/cut off sleeves etc.). Many of these folks were still living the dream that should have died as soon as they finished high school or their GED. Many of the fatter sloths at this place guzzled $7 cheap watered down budweiser and waved ther fists in the air singing along with the songs. One gut that was there had a White Lion shirt from some tour. His child (w/ a rat-tail) was with him. There is no doubt in my mind that this child was concieved in the hatchback of a pickup truck during such a tour. Mom was nowhere to bee seen becasue she probably left the child with the guy and either died or ended up leaving after a show with some roadie or a member of a similar hair band. Way to go mom! There were these two girls in their early thirties that were having the time of their life. They most likely had high ranking positions as a secretary or paralegal (same3 thing). They may have even been nurses. They seemed to be in ecstacy as Brett Michaels crooned "I want action..", and urged the females to tear off their shirts. After the show, these two girls who may have been room mates, probably went home and shared fond memories of the jock they always drooled for in High school but never got the attention of (by the way, that jock was probably there...he of course was now the girls basketball coach at a public school). The girls, sharing memories probably cried and wished everything could have been the way it was in the eighties. I was not in shock as I saw all these people though, because I live in Virginia, and mullets, nascar, cheap beer and cut off t-shirts are as common as the trailer parks that riddle it. Damn, I need to leave this state and go back west.

EPILOGUE

I left the show with fond memories, but longed to get home to bang J's Mom. It took me an hour and a half to get out of the damn parking lot, so I could not get the damn 40 oz. of Old English I had been craving. There were sobriety tests being conducted outside of the arena, and half of the damn trailer folks were being pulled over. I got home and tore up some Vodka, so I could feel like a rock star. I woke up the next day, and the dream was over. I was however inspired to start Hair Metal Fridays. Every Friday (until I get bored of this little kick) I will play Twisted Sister, Cinderella, Motley Crue and any other kind of music of this sort. I will rock Jack Daniels and MGD and get torn up. Come and join me if youd like, just e-mail me and we'll party like its 1989. Peace.

2002-07-06T23:11:00.000-04:00

Grandma Leperskin has gone nuts for a while! She and Gerandpa recently posted a threat to the readers of Leperskins that a malnourished stray kitten would be relocated every day that no feedback was left The same was to be applied to the Grandma and Grandpa Self Promotion Petition. Noone has signe d the petition for a few days and Grandma gota bit irked. I think she understood nobody wanted to touch our filthy page on independence day, and therefore did not really care too much. There has been a 300% increase in user comments and there are already some petitions. But Grandma is not satisfied! I believe she may have already relocated one of the kittens today! Sorry, I wish I could stop her, but Grandma is a hardcore thug, and bitch-slappin' is her game. You may ask, how can she expect to continue this? Afterall there is only a certain amount of kittens to be relocated. I mean is the mom kitten a veritable baby monster, squirting out spawn after spawn at a rate that violates all scientific understanding of a cats gestation period? I don't know. But like I said Grandma is a tyrant, and may seek to punish other forms of life, or as threatened regarding the petition, she may begin to subjecate the weak and disabled to terrible humiliation. Not sure.

2002-07-06T19:54:00.000-04:00

In an attempt to spread the gospel, and the glorious rantings and nonsense of LEPERSKINS, I have decided to post an occasional update on pop culkture and other neat stuff from other regions of our world. I don't feel as though I dedicate enough time focusing on ASIA. So every week or so, I will attempt (unless I get lazy, forget, get shot by some mob of crazy lesbian nazis in wheelchairs) to dedicate some time and energy to the Asians...They need a say at LEPERSKINS. Rock on.

...TOKYO (AP) -- Ami Onuki and Yumi Yoshimura have been at the top of the pop charts in Japan, hosted their own TV show, and inspired enough toys, dolls and even shoes to fill the Tokyo Dome....(more PUFFY!)

2002-07-04T06:11:00.000-04:00

...

This may possibly be the coolest thing ever! This is just as cool as the PUSSY SNORKEL. This could be useful for anyone who needs to passa urine test on the spot. With the dehydrtated human urine crystals, you cannot go wrong. You must check this thing out, because it rules!

Check out some of the testimonials...

"I smoke every day, and being Asian, I have little wang. Now with Whizzinator I can take test and go into public restroom with confidence. Ah soo tang-q."
-Sushi Sucker, Osaka, Japan

"Thanks Dude, my piss is clean as a whistle."
-Jack Daniels, KS

"man do i got a story for u... I was 18 zand my life was going nowhere, and my good buddy dan flounders gave me this website...since i made a latin purchase, i cant keep the ladies away...THANKS WHIZZINATOR"
-Matt Greim

"We here at DEA division of Lockheed/Boeing have been on the lookout for the Whizzinator and our employees cheating, but the damn thing is so good, we can't catch them using it short of shaking after each use. Please take it off the market. Be patriotic."
-Rutherford Augistine, Security Chief, CA

"My friend bought the one from the competition, and when he saw my new Whizzinator, he threw his straight into the trash"
-Bryan J., Irving TX

2002-07-04T05:43:00.000-04:00

Tony the Tiger kicks ass...Check this out!

2002-07-04T05:30:00.000-04:00

...Yep.

2002-07-04T05:16:00.000-04:00

...Hillary Clinton doing a nasty sexy dance for the senate. Go Hillary, its your birthday...

2002-07-04T04:54:00.000-04:00

WHO THE FUCK IS THIS GUY KIDDING?!

Beatles guru: $1 billion to save the world
...NEW YORK (Reuters) -- Beatles guru Maharishi Mahesh Yogi said on Wednesday in a July 4 message to Americans nervous about new September 11-style attacks that he could kill world terrorism with love -- but he would need $1 billion to do it.

"July 4 could be a great day for freedom," Maharishi, who brought Transcendental Meditation to the West more than 40 years ago and is a spiritual inspiration to some 6 million people worldwide, said in a conference call from the Netherlands.

Maharishi said that with $1 billion he could train 40,000 expert meditators, or "Vedic Pandits," who would generate enough good vibes to save the world. His press office said $85 million toward that goal had already been raised. (more Bullshit)

2002-07-04T04:41:00.000-04:00

Error 404

2002-07-04T04:09:00.000-04:00

I've already commented on the fact that Troma kicks ass, and I wish I could be a member of the Troma Team. I'm like a liitle girl looking at Justin Timberlake or some other teen boy-toy, except Toxie and Noxie could easily kick Justin Timberlakes ass. I saw Citizen Toxie in Canada, and I met Lloyd Kaufman. He signed a copy of Terror Firmer for my girlfriend and told us to e-mail him and let us know what we thought of s few movies under the Troma label. Well Citezen Toxie is coming out on film in Novemebr. People can purchase screeners from Troma though. I highly recomend it for anyone who wants to see something fresh. I am going to pre-order the soundtrack, because I kick ass. All for now.

2002-07-04T04:04:00.000-04:00

Missouri requires Pledge of Allegiance in schools

Okay, I need to rant and rave about something here. This is my page and my opinion is all that counts here. I understand the rebuttal arguments that could be given. However, opinions are like assholes and everyone has one, and I just don't want to have anything to do with anyone's asshole...So there.

Anyway, I really don't give two shits about the pledge. I appreciate the what America represents (I could give two shits about half of it's citizens : greedy, money-grubbing, infantile bitches). I don't need a slogan, phrase or pledge. I don't care whether or not God, Allah, Yaweh, Satan, or even your mom are mentioned in the pledge. Yes, the pledge of allegence can be taken as a symbol, or a representation of what America is all about, but so is Apple Pie and Baseball. I hate baseball and apple pie, but I don't find their presence in violation of my constitutional rights. I understand that many people find fault in the pledge of allegience which has not been revamped for nearly 50 years, but do you all need a fucking pledge to support your beleifs? If so, there are plenty of countries out ther you should check out. They are called dictatorships.

I think what really bothers me about the whole pledge of allegience issue is that Congress is wasting millions of our tax dollars throwing conflicting, but equally valid arguments back and forth. Who gives a shit? As long as there are people that believe in God, and people who don't (or believe in something else...like a carrot), this argument will never be settled. Its pointless! Omit the God part and place some other phrase where God once was. ..."one nation under wad..." [you get the point]!

Happy Fourth of July.

2002-07-02T18:13:00.000-04:00

SIGN THE GRANDPA AND GRANDPA SELF-ADVANCEMENT (WITH YOUR HELP AS INSPIRED BY US) PETITION!

Hey Everyone, I have createad a petition. It is cooler than any petition ever made. It is a petition for Grandma and Grandpa Leperskin to get Props. Go to it! Please! No, Go to it Now. I am holdin the same standard I have placed on my guestbook (see the baby kitten threat placed earlier [I will relocate a malnourished kitten to another part of the city-away from its mother's nutrient rich breast milk each day there is a lapse in signatures]. Thank Goodness (and me) there was a comment placed by J Man. Anyway's Sign it or the kittens get it. When I run out of kittens to misplace, I will start publically humiliating an albino child, downs syndrome kid or any other maladjusted citizen. The worst is yet to come...bwaahaahahahahaha!

Love,
Grandma and Grandpa Leperskin!

2002-07-02T17:33:00.000-04:00

...Bums fighting with each other on video...Proof that anything conceivable can be sold, and that America (or the world) nolonger has any taste. Nothing is Shocking. Either way, this rules, and I am going to be the first person I know to own this. As a matter of fact, I am goin to get it right now...I rule. Click on the picture of the scruffy burly bum to check out a video preview (requires quicktime).

Go to Bumfights.comand get the video....Now!

2002-07-02T17:11:00.000-04:00

...Today is all about weird toys. Here is a Jenna Jameson porn star action figure. What are some cool action figures dolls, toys that can be found on the net. Grandma and Grandpa are interested and need your help....click on the naked figure of Jenna Jacobson to see a more detailed page of her attributes. Also included is an advertisement to by a VICTORIA SILVSTEDT (Playboy) action figure...Hmmm...I wonder if there are any nude/porn star ACTION action figures.

2002-07-02T17:03:00.000-04:00

...A collectible John Wayne Gacy as Pogo the Clown figure! Equally tasteless and equally as cool as the autopsy babies, these limited time serial killer toys are going to turn some heads. Also available are Ed Gein, Charles Manson, Jeffrey Dahmer. I am sure if these things get a little bigger, we can expect to see more favorites. Is Jack the Ripper or Albert Fish on the way? Whadaya Think?

2002-07-02T16:53:00.000-04:00

...This is some of the most twisted art I have ever seen. I would like to see if these things become really big or simply get banned. Check out the recent Pinhead Hellraiser baby! This doll fetched a pretty penny on e-bay recently! Awesome!

2002-07-02T15:57:00.000-04:00

...Awesome Japanese mistranslations. Great site to laugh at a completely different language.

2002-06-30T13:10:00.000-04:00

...Grandma and Grandpa Leperskin have been out of the office for some time because they needed a bit of Rest and Relaxation. Please Note, Gandma Leperskin will attack if you do not sign the guestbook...That's that. Now for some completely unrelated news...

I may be attending the Poison, Cinderella, and Winger concert. I don't know how I am going to handle it...Thesew bands were at their peak when I was 9 years old. I never had a mullet, acid washed jeans (or did I?) or teased frizzy hair. I never felt like a crazy rebel in tights and torn up sleeveless tee shirts. I am sure I am going to see quite a few people in their mid thirties reliving those special days. I may need to bring some hair clippers and steal one of those weird bastards' mullets. Because I'm worth it!

2002-06-30T13:08:00.000-04:00

...Hmm, No comment.

2002-06-30T12:22:00.000-04:00

GIRLS, GRRLS, GURLS! Hot girls with sweaty nipples getting down like hyenas! Hot girls shitting on society like Raymond Burr! Hot girl/girl cam action 24/7! Hot dragon-girls giving Gandalf head! The Simpsons, The Clash, The Osbournes (even though Bush 43 likes 'em), Star Wars, Lemony Snicket, Menstrual appliances, chicks in eyepatches, The Sopranos--not necessarily in that or any order. In fact, order is my enemy. Chaos will reign here!!

Beautiful! Banzai! Folks, this is a prime example of a site that I feel can truly entertain, exploit and eventuall rot the brain cells of people who want to see, hear and experience completely insane rants from a quadrapalegic hermaphrodite. I must demand that more people visit Banzai's Blog of Fantastic Terror. (visit my site first, though)

2002-06-30T11:59:00.000-04:00

...Very interesting. This chart is a reflection of my global popularity. Evidently a majority of my visitors are on the eastern seaboard, and in parts of western South America. I think I may be quite popular with the Argentinians. I may have to convert my site to spanish very soon, but I am not sure. We'll see. Right now, my goal is to have many more Southeast Asians and Eastern Europeans looking at my site. How can I capture their hearts? Lets start promoting my site in the Czchec Republic.

2002-06-30T11:51:00.000-04:00

All right, I have a guestbook, and nobody seems to want to ever use it. Please sign my damn guestbook and send me some ideas of what you want too see. I will respond to comments. I would just like some input from anyone. Please. Tell me you hate me, love me, yearn to wear my pants, whatever. Okay, here is a threat: There is a brand new litter of cats that live outside of my apartment. They are strays and super-cute. Now, I must warn you, they still depend on the vitamin-rich breast milk of their mother. Every day that passes where there is no comment in my guest book, will justify my wrath!@ I will take a kitten, stick it in a box and relocte it to another part of the city of Fredericksburg. Total chaos! Total mahem! I am so sinister! Beware! AHHHHH!

Love,
Grandma Leperskin

2002-06-30T11:34:00.000-04:00

R. Kelly saying "Who's Your Daddy?" to a little girl.

2002-06-30T11:17:00.000-04:00

Wham-O co-founder dies

June 29, 2002 Posted: 10:23 PM EDT (CNN)

...COSTA MESA, Calif. (AP) -- Arthur "Spud" Melin, co-founder of the toy company that introduced the world to the Frisbee, Hula Hoop and other faddish gems of American pop culture, has died. He was 77 and had Alzheimer's disease...(more)

Do you think he remembered inventing those toys...(Ahhh, one more step closer to hell.)

2002-06-30T10:53:00.000-04:00

...(spank)Okay, yesterday I went to Paramount King's Dominion. It was cool. Rollercoasters are cool. I am cool. Yet, despite the coolness rollercoasters or myself project. There is one much cooler thing. My freind Kerry Knowles Jr. He and another freind of mine were playing a game where you throw quarters at a center plate. He who lands a quarter on the second plate wins a Playstaion 2. I wasted 15 dollars tring to win that damn game system. Kerry threw one damn quarter and won. This is why he is cool and I am 15 dollars poorer. Yet I am still cool by association, and I was able to conjure up a deal with him. You see folks, he already has a Playstation 2. I on the other hand have nothing. Initially he planned to sell the game system on e-bay for a profit, or even attemp to return his original Playstation2 and keep the cash. But with my wiley wit and stealthy buisness approach, I was able to convince the guy to sell the new game system to me for 100 dollars or so. I rule.

2002-06-30T10:42:00.000-04:00

...Okay, I am temporaily back. I can't say for how long though, so get off! I am a very busy little bastard, and I don't have the time to post lately because I am currently working two jobs so that I may someday finish my education, which has been dominating my life for the past 4 years. Yes folks, I should have already graduated, but I could not make up my damn mind, and . Anyways, why would any of you care about that? You all want the recent news, updates and other mindless bullshit. Either way, there may or may not be more shiat posted here in the next few hours or days. I'm trying my best to do what I can with three arms.

2002-06-27T09:53:00.000-04:00

because I'm so damn lazy, I won't even post a thing of my own. Not a shred of my own intellegence/stupidity will be posted!....at least until I want to! So here is a cry for sympathy and assistance from my homeboy Banzai

This is an official plaintive cry for attention. Visit my site http://banzaiterror.blogspot.com and place your vote for toughest President! I am Banzai! Why do I need a pseudonym, you may ask? Well, you'll have to see it to believe it! You may vote either by e-mailing my special account: banzai_fett@hotmail.com , hitting my NEW! comment feature (check the byline of the post for the word comment?), or use the convenient Tag-Board (TM, C). While you are visiting, check out all the cool stuff that I have written or stolen from other, wittier folks! Chime in on the Chipotle fast food debate, check my archives, link to my friends! Propose a link of your own! Pummel me about the head and shoulders, I don't care! I'm here to entertain.

Tell all your friends! Well,maybe not all--not everyone can handle the amazing content that I have produced!

(if this e-mail is unwanted, merely reply to it with: don't mail me this shit! in the subject line, I'll understand)

2002-06-27T09:43:00.000-04:00

I have not posted for a long time because I have been busy...so piss off!. I'll be back shortly with more nonsense, rants, mooched information, deformed human beings and insight into the Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes conspiracy. Muthafuckas!

2002-06-17T11:44:00.000-04:00

...

2002-06-17T11:34:00.000-04:00

...WHO GIVES A SHIT?!

2002-06-17T10:37:00.000-04:00

...How Christian are you?

...And when you're done testing your Christian knowledge, check out God's new phone deal...

2002-06-17T10:35:00.000-04:00

Theories begin to unravel as to what really happened with Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes.

...In one of the most bizarre pop star conspiracies of all time, Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes is rumored to still be alive. Unidentified Sources have confirmed that Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes, "is still alive and kickin' it. I know it may be difficult for many people to accept. When 2-Pac (Tupac Shakur) was killed in a gang related drive-by, many peolp attempted to explain that he was still alive. This was definitely not true. He was most definitely gunned down and very dead. On the other hand we have Lopes, who is now beleived to be alive, and not many people have been exposed to the idea."

One Source claims she has already spoke with Lopes. "I received an e-mail in late May from Lisa. She told me all is well. She also informed me she will be 'undercover' for a while. She has some serious issues to work out, and I don't think being in the public eye is a very healthy idea right now. I know she expressed a sincere and tearful Thank You to all of her fans who mourned her death."

Some researchers into the matter of Lopes' now known 'death hoax' have made dozens of gueses as to why Lopes may have staged her own death. The reasons range from drug addiction to a potential sex change operation. One investigator in the matter suggested that Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes had been involved in a pornography ring, and failed to stop the tape from being sent to the right sources. "I guess she figured that being killed in a car wreck may have disuaded even ruthless pornographers from spreading her footage.

(More details to come in the Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes Conspiracy.)

2002-06-17T09:32:00.000-04:00

Feds charge forestry worker with starting fire

CASTLE ROCK, Colorado (CNN) -- Federal authorities Sunday arrested a longtime U.S. Forest Service employee for allegedly starting the largest fire in Colorado's history.

Prosecutors said Terry Barton, a 38-year-old Colorado woman, burned in anger a letter from her estranged husband, in violation of a ban on fires in the tinder-dry Pike National Forest. She apparently thought the fire had been extinguished and left it only to find later that it was spreading, they said.

She then tried to suppress the fire but it grew, said Bill Leone, first U.S. district attorney for the District of Colorado.

Barton is charged with setting fire to timber in a national forest, damaging federal property and making false statements to federal fire investigators. She faces as many as 10 years in prison and as much as $500,000 in fines. (more)

Hey, that's quite an accomplishment. I mean it sucks that this lady's stirred emotions burned down the state of Colorado, but now she has the a reputable name amongst pyromaniacs. Sweet.

I have also heard that there may heve been multiple reasons for the fires. For instance, along with the torched letter tossed out by Terry Barton, there may have also been a fire started within one of the coal mines. That means that the fire may be spreading underground...Colorado...Who knows. Inspired by the fires, I may have to go home and torch a few items in my grill. This could potentially boom into my new hobby: Setting items on fire on a used grill. Everything goes.

2002-06-17T09:18:00.000-04:00

How in Hell could a Zero-Tolerance Proposal take anything but a signature at the Vatican. Those sick bastards molested children...there is no debate!

Bishops approve new policy on abusive priests

DALLAS, Texas (CNN) -- U.S. Catholic bishops Friday voted overwhelmingly in favor of a resolution barring clerics who have engaged in sexual abuse from continuing in the ministry.

The vote was 239-13, taken at the end of Friday's session of the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops meeting.

The policy will be an interim policy in place for the next two years. As such, it does not require Vatican approval.

As the bishops debated the proposal Friday, an important Roman Catholic newspaper reported that a "zero-tolerance" stance might have a rough time getting approval at the Vatican....(more)

2002-06-14T06:22:00.000-04:00

Vacuum robbers sweep up gems haul
...PARIS, France -- Thieves carrying out a series of jewellery raids in Paris now have a new weapon in their armoury -- a vacuum cleaner.
Four men entered a jewellery shop in a wealthy Paris district, smashed display cabinets, and then used a battery-operated, hand-held vacuum to clear up in seconds.

The men raced away from the scene of the crime on motorbikes.

"Using a vacuum cleaner, that was new. Thieves certainly don't lack innovation," said Patrick Mauduit, a spokesman for

police officers' union Synergie Officiers, told Reuters.

"We'll certainly see that again. It's clever. In one swipe they sucked up jewels that usually have to be picked by hand."

The attack was the latest in a spate of armed daylight robberies on jewellers and foreign-exchange offices in the French capital.

The raids have made national headlines as much for the thieves' barefaced cheek as for their increased frequency.

2002-06-12T11:44:00.000-04:00

...Here is an awesome site if you want to see pictures of people vomitting! Bulimics should not enter THE GREAT CHUNDER PAGE

2002-06-12T11:16:00.000-04:00

CONSPIRICY NEWSFLASH!!!: Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes is not dead! (So who is the body in the picture?)

...Without going into too much detail, I can say that I have some very convincing evidence that Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes of the Super R&B group, TLC DID NOT DIE in a car wreck on April 26, 2002. This is a major hoax. Sources (undisclosed at this time) indicate that Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes is not in fact dead. Lopes, while engaging in various volenteer activities was able to slip away un-noticed at some point on April 26. "There was definitley a corpse of a Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes-look-alike. I am not sure where the corpse came from, who it is and if the body was obtained through hostile means. However at some point, the "Left Eye"-look-alike was placved at the scene of the accident. Lopes had already slipped away. Chances are she was not even in the car at any time." The anonymous source provided this information, pending his/her location would not be released. The source also suggested that Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes may have been vey aware that a car accident would be fatal to some of her freinds in the car.

Lopes is no stranger to mischeif, and our sources beleive she wanted to get away from all of the media hype surrounding her controversial strife with TLC. Lopes, also known to be a vandal is regarded as clever and manipulative. At this time, there is no evidence to suggest that she has left the Honduras. However, the singer had established a hefty cash savings and could easily slip away. Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes' fellow group members declined to elaborate on her disappearance. More details are to come.

2002-06-12T10:16:00.000-04:00

...Gerbil Aviation Kicks ASS!. Everything Gerbil and sacred at the Church of Gerbil. I also need to post this. I'm sure all of you already know that Richard Gere never crammed a gerbil up his ass. If you don't, well know it now. Seriously, everyone has heard a slight variation of the story, and I am positive we all know someone who was a nurse there that night. Yep, 5,000 nurses helped extract that pesky rodent from Richard Gere's ass that fateful evening. Anyway, I am sure all of you who beleive that Richard Gere is a gerbil packer, are also pretty content to accept that Jamie Lee Curtis is a hermaphrodite. Hell, I'm going to start my own rumor....Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes faked her death. That is why nobody can find any of her pictures. Look at the picture of her at the right of my page. That hardly looks like her. Yeah, that's correct Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes is still alive and living well in a small town in the Honduras. More updates to come!...

And just for all of you who are somewhat fascinated by Richard Gere packing gerbils, here is some info on gerbilling. THE DANGERS OF GERBILLING

2002-06-12T10:08:00.000-04:00

On Ebay, anything can be bought. Check this out...This guy says the stranger that pays for his wifes Boob Job can sit around and fondle them for a while. The winner also gets a picture of his wifes breasts after the job is done. How cool.

Check ot FEEL WIFES BREASTS IF YOU PAY FOR BOOB JOB!

2002-06-11T21:28:00.000-04:00

I was watching the Mike Tyson fight the other night...well waiting to watch it. There was this other guy at the party who was cracking some jokes, and he told one that made me laugh. To me there is nothing better than a very, very, tasteless joke. I was hysterical. I most likely lost another peice of my withering, phlegm encrusted soul...but it sure was worth it.

A lady in labor is brought into the maternity ward and immediately tended to by a team of nurses and doctors. She is given her epidural, the works and finally after quite some time, she puishes out the little bugger. The doctor immediately wraps the baby up and takes it from the room. After a few minutes the newly blessed mother begins to get concerned, and she begins yelling for the doctor to bring the baby back to her.

Suddenly the doctor crashes through the door holding the baby by the legs like some freshly hunted rabbit. He begins swinging the baby aroung and banging it on the table screaming "Die ! Die! Die, you little bastard. I'll make sure you exist no more!"

In shock the woman is able to squeal...."(gasp) What are you doing?!"

The doctor turns to the woman, giggling mischeiviously and says "April Fools Day M'am...it was already dead."

2002-06-11T21:09:00.000-04:00

Well, well, another added to the dead celebrities hall of fame. I would have got it in quicker (although, I'm sure all of you heard about it anyway), but I was out banging a certain someones mom!. Anyway, I don't think it will rack in the hits like Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes did, but it may. Either way, it's a shame. If I were ever going to be a criminal, it would be with the mob. Sorry folks. They are so well organized and far mor respectful to their own (much more than a government) that I have to give it to them...They are almost better tan legitamite!. Kick ass!

'Dapper Don' John Gotti dead
Brought down by the Bull

...SPRINGFIELD, Missouri (CNN) -- Convicted mobster John Gotti -- the ruthlessly brutal but stylishly dressed New York Mafia chief with silver slicked-back hair who reveled in the public spotlight as the "Dapper Don" -- died of cancer at a federal prison hospital Monday at age 61.
An FBI spokeswoman said the death occurred about 12 p.m. (1 p.m. ET) but had no other details.

Gotti was serving a life sentence after being convicted of murder and racketeering.

Gotti had been suffering from cancerous lesions on his tongue, neck and ears. He had been imprisoned at the U.S. Medical Center for Federal Prisoners in Springfield since 2000 when he was transferred from a maximum security federal prison in Marion, Illinois. (more)

2002-06-09T12:10:00.000-04:00
...Another thought, I was hoping, while watchin Mike Tyson Get his ass kicked, that he might attack and bite a fool. For old times sake. I was wondering if he would maul him and just say "Fuck it, I'm going to lose, I might as well just fuck his ear up as well....why not?" Well he didn't. He just let Lewis rape him and that was it. No blood. Damn.

2002-06-09T11:17:00.000-04:00
...Saw it. Tyson made it to the 8th round. That was pretty impressive, considering Lewis started to beat his has like a lttle bitch in the 2nd round. Tyson got 2 awesome jabs in in the beginning. I think he used all the energy he had there though. While I was watching the fight, I wondered, "Is Mike Tyson capable of fathoming a defeat. I mean he was getting his ass kicked for nearly 7 rounds. Does he even imagine he will be knocked out. I mean, he is a big dumb animal. (actually, he thinks he's a "Tyranosaurus" and a "tyranical tiger"...what the fuck?!) What I'm saying is: Does Mike Tyson think, "Oh shit, I'm 'bout ready to fall on my downs syndrome looking face!"? Whatever. Praise Allah and Cheese!

2002-06-08T19:35:00.000-04:00
...Okay, I am now completely fascinated, if not, obsessed with Christian Satire sites. I think they are good. Not as cool as Laxtime (the dude probably thinks I'm a psycho, but he's one of the first to link to me...and my heart goes out to you...and satan for posessing Laxtime and making him link to me...all for the price of 1/4 of my soul. I can still get 2 camaros, 1 million dollars and a day-old-doughnut with the rest of my soul). Anyway, Christian Satire sites rule....for now. Lets see how long ADHD boy can stay focused! Stay Albino!

2002-06-08T19:32:00.000-04:00
"I fornicate and get drunk frequently. I believe Buddah was a kind dude. I saw the Grateful Dead in concert over 200 times. I love black pussy. I work as an Internet technologist for Beelzebubba. I voted for Clinton twice, and never for Jesse Helms. I've had sex in a church, and in a graveyard. I've seen "Sid and Nancy" 73 times. I lie. Or maybe not. I've lusted (in my heart) for Rosalyn Carter, Lenny Bruce, and a basset hound. My middle name is Onan. I go to shag clubs. I stole a christmas tree from a church fundraising lot. I once nicked $10 from a collection plate. I think "The Flinstones" is sexy. Did I mention that my middle name is Onan?"...

Check out Book of the Forgiven at Christ's Love!

2002-06-08T10:45:00.000-04:00
Wow another dead rock star. Drugs seem to be catching up to many of our favorite rockers this year. Will the trand continue. Well Dee Dee Ramone is dead and we would like to welcome him to the Dead Celebrities Archive!

Dee Dee Ramone found dead; OD suspected

...LOS ANGELES, California (CNN) -- Dee Dee Ramone, bassist and one of the founding members of the seminal punk band the Ramones, was found dead in his Hollywood home, the Los Angeles coroner's office said Thursday. He was 49.

Ramone's death apparently was the result of an accidental drug overdose, said Katie Elliot, spokeswoman for Ramone's manager.

Drug paraphernalia, including a syringe, reportedly were found in the kitchen of the home. Elliot said it is not known what kind of drug was involved.

2002-06-08T10:26:00.000-04:00
...Is Jamie Lee Curtis a Hermaphrodite. For all you rednecks what I mean to say is: That chick in True Lies and Haloween. I she some sort of a chick with a dick? I remember watching Trading Places when I was younger and seeing Jamie Lee Curtis take off her top in front of Dan Ackroyd. I was pretty Amazed. I was only 7 or 8 years old, but I thought to myself, "Hey Jamie Lee Curtis has a nice rack o' lambs!" Anyway I also thought she was pretty hot when she did the dance scene in True Lies for Arnold Schwartzenegger. So I became rather furious the other day when my room mates girlfriend started telling me Jamie Lee Curtis is a Herm. Man, there is absolutely no way that WOMAN has a penis. I am not insucure with it. I just don't like to think that one of the first nude women I saw on TV has a shlong. Whatever. My girlfriend also said JLC is a herm. I just sat there and listen to them tell me how much of a man she was. Listen, there are many hermaphrodites out there, and most of them are completely unknown to the wold. Most of the time, they are more of one sex than the other. It is almost a more extreme version of any regular human being that has an unequal balance of male and female hormones. Either way, Jamie Lee Curtis, whether or not she has a bit of a nub is still pretty hot. Chances are, that if she is a hermaphrodite, she just has an enlarged clitoris. That is okay. It's not like I'm ever going to be alone and naked in a room with her. I just remember seeing her boobies as a child and thinking. "Those boobs are really big and well proportioned." Yep that is exactly what went through my mind. Kick ass.

2002-06-04T23:34:00.000-04:00
Okay, I was thinking about this tonight. Afew years ago, I was in Spain with a whole shload of people I did not like. My Spanish professor had arranged a ten day trip to Spain for any student who wanted to go. He was able to conjure enough students that he could....Man fuck that story, I'll be back to that later. I started tryng to post that about 3 days ago. Work has been really busy...Well...I''ve been putting in 35 to 40 full hours of Real Work each week. Not just sitting at my desk longing for 3:00 PM....Tangeant...The reason I'm interupting my little diatribe right now is because LAXTIME linked to me...I feel like a 13 year old at an N*Sync Concert. Biatch. Thanks Laxtime....You are super cool. You are cooler than Elvis, God and my Troma Movie collection combined (times 2).

Folks, In case you have not already noticed...I have no standards. I am a whore.....Muthafucka!!

2002-06-03T11:22:00.000-04:00
...Okay, LAXTIME is 150,000 times cooler than this site will EVER be....I wish I was as cool. No matter what happens, no matter how cool I think my post may have been that day, I always end up returning to Laxtime to find out there are a zillion new cool things. I want to be that cool, but Laxtime won't even link to me. I could be cool by association, if he would just allow me to be one of his links. I need the help of all 4 or 5 (on a good day) people who visit me daily. Let's make Grandma and Grandpa second best! Yay! By the way, that awesome picture is courtesey of laxtime! NOOOOOOO!!!! TOO cool.

2002-05-30T17:40:00.000-04:00
A great item for fans of karaoke, this is Mr. Mic, vibrating sexual massage unit that's shaped like a big, bulbous karaoke microphone. Features dual heads that move separately -- a swirling movement in the "mic" main section, and excellent vibration in the secondary section. Control with the include wired remote control, which takes standard AA batteries. A great joke gift from Japan!

2002-05-30T17:33:00.000-04:00
I forgot all about H-Dogg!...Well, I'll probably be posting one of his things each day. I didn't write this, but I'll jack it. Stay caucasion...

KEEP YOUR FUCKING SHIT OFF MY DESK!
...Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, bruthahs 'n' sistahs. H-Dog here, His Stone Cold Baadness, The Original Gangsta, The Mack Daddy, The Freaky Gangbanga. And I got somethin' to say to all y'all bitches out there: Keep yo' motherfuckin' shit offa my desk, or I'll fuck your sorry ass up wit' a quickness. And I don't want to see y'all comin' around, puttin' your feet on it, neither. Or puttin' your goddamn coffee cups on it and leaving them fucked-up rings all upside the wood and shit.

'Cause I keep my fly shit on my desk. I gots my dope spreadsheets, my hangin' file folders, my delinquent-account file, my paper clips, my Post-It note dispenser, my monthly desk planner, my Midstate Office Supply business cards, my four-color ball-point pen, my motherfuckin' dot-matrix printer address labels, and my stoopid-fresh three-hole punch. Not to mention my computer. I swear, if I see any of y'all within three feet of my computer, I'll put a Lee Van Cleef on your bitch ass. I'll come at you like a mother fuck.

I'm just trying to keep it real, know what I'm sayin'? I wanna stop the violence before it starts. I could say nothin' and wait in the shadows like some motherfuckin' ninja, and when some punk-ass temp worker come along and start readin' my "Attitude Is A Little Thing That Makes A Big Difference" Successories mouse pad, I could jump out and knock the sucka's teeth the fuck out. 'Cause that would be my right. A man's gotta protect what's his, right?

Take what happened just last week. Judy Metzger, this li'l skank-ass ho from Accounts Payable, be runnin' her ass around the office, puttin' cupcakes wit' the goddamn smiley faces and shit on people's desks. I'm like, "Whus this smiley-face shit y'all be puttin' on my desk?" And she's like, "I made cupcakes for everyone in the office last night!"

Now, I don't take shit from nobody, and I sure as hell don't take no shit from some bitch from Accounts Payable, so I picks up my letter opener and do some crazy kung-fu shit on her. "Flag yo' ass outta here, bitch, and keep yo' fuckin' cupcake shit offa my fly desk."

She go runnin' out of the room and go gets her supervisor, Myron Schabe, from across the hall. Like I'm supposed to be scared of that. Myron older than shit and he wear bow ties like he Pee Wee Muthafuckin' Herman or somethin'. So then he come up to my cubicle and say, "Herbert, I think there's been a misunderstanding. It was Judy's turn this week to bring in a treat." I tell him I don't like no bitches from Accounts Payable puttin' no shit on my desk. But this Myron fool keep pushin' it, tellin' me: "It was meant as a nicety, Herbert, nothing else. It's Co-Worker Appreciation Month, and everybody's scheduled to bring in a treat. You yourself are signed up for next Wednesday."

So you know what I tell him? I says, "I ain't gonna be bringing in no motherfuckin' treat, motherfucker. Treats is for old ladies in the nursing home and shit. And ain't nobody gonna be layin' they smiley-face bullshit on my dope fly desk. I gots everything where I want it, and ain't no little ho gonna be fuckin' it all up. So take yo' bitch-ass, bow-tie self and get the fuck out of my cubicle before I cut you, beee-yaatch!"

After that, Myron walk out of there wit' his li'l dick between his legs. Ain't no Accounts Payable supervisor motherfucka gonna tell Herbert Kornfeld what to do. And no one else, for that matter. You put shit on my desk, you just signed your death warrant. I mean it. Heads will get flown.

H-Dog out. And to all my homies in Accountz Reeceevable and the bruthahs kickin' it down in Shipping, keep ya heads up. Peace.

2002-05-30T17:21:00.000-04:00
... SEXUAL TENSION BETWEEN ARAFAT, SHARON REACHES BREAKING POINT
JERUSALEM—The long-simmering sexual tension between Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon and Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat finally reached a breaking point Monday, culminating in a passionate kiss before a shocked delegation of Mideast negotiators.

Above: Arafat and Sharon share an awkward moment.
"You always got the feeling that there was something more behind all the anger and tension," said European Union Foreign Policy Chief Javier Solana. "They wouldn't agree on anything, even though their people were dying, locked in this unending conflict. It never made sense—until now."

Continued Solana: "All that repressed passion. And neither of them would admit it to the other... or to themselves."...(more!)

According to sources, midway through a 10 a.m. meeting to discuss a possible pullout of Israeli troops from several West Bank settlements, Sharon accused Arafat of secretly channeling PLO funds into Hamas and other terrorist organizations. The accusation prompted Arafat to rise from his chair and stand toe-to-toe with his Israeli counterpart. The ensuing heated exchange quickly escalated into a shouting match, which reached an unexpected crescendo when the two leaders embraced in a deep, passionate kiss

2002-05-30T16:17:00.000-04:00
...WOW! A Penis-Mobile! Sweet... I wonder what this guy says at the DMV registration...."Ummm, yes, that is my 89 Ford Penis! Would you like to take it for a test drive"

Coolness Rating: 7

2002-05-30T15:57:00.000-04:00
...Diana Ross Checks Into Rehab Center
Diana Ross arrives at the "VH1 Divas 2000: A Tribute to Diana Ross" in this April 9, 2000 file photo, in New York. Ross has entered a drug and alcohol rehabilitation center before she begins an international summer tour, her spokesman said Thursday, May 30, 2002. .

2002-05-30T15:35:00.000-04:00
FBI Issues Missile Launcher Alert
WASHINGTON (AP) - The FBI (news - web sites) told police departments an empty launcher for a shoulder-fired anti-aircraft missile found near a military base in Saudi Arabia was linked to al-Qaida, but cautioned there were no signs terrorists planned to fire on U.S. commercial jetliners...(more!)

2002-05-29T20:37:00.000-04:00
Pistol used to kill Selena found

CORPUS CHRISTI, Texas (AP) -- The revolver used to kill Tejano singer Selena turned up at the home of the court reporter from the shooter's 1995 trial, investigators said.

The .38-caliber Taurus revolver was lost after the trial of Yolanda Saldivar, the former president of Selena's fan club who killed the Grammy winner at a Corpus Christi motel in March 1995. Saldivar was convicted of murder and is serving a life sentence.

Former court reporter Sandra Oballe, who is now studying law in Houston, didn't know she had the weapon, Nueces County District Attorney Carlos Valdez said. The gun was found in a box of office supplies at her home...(more!)

2002-05-29T17:03:00.000-04:00
Bridge Attack Threat a Big Misunderstanding.

--Kabul Taliban Director of Truck Bomb Operations, Abdul Kook Al-Whacko reported that there is currently no operation underway to destroy bridges on the American West Coast, as has been reported by the American Media. "It's all a mistake" Al-Whacko said "I was coming out of my cave this morning, talking to my dentist on my cell phone, saying that we had to take a bridge out, because my mouth is killing me". "Some damn reporter was hanging out in the bushes, and must have overheard me" he said. "Maybe we can get Sean Penn to join us as Killer of Western Reporters, I think he'd like that" Al-Whacko added.

Since taking over the position of Director of Truck Bomb Operations, Al-Wacko has developed plans for bombing bridges, but insists that they do not target American Bridges. "A fifty-three foot trailer full of Tim McVeigh Surprise would really do a number on a bridge like the Golden Gate, but we are busy with other plans right now" he said....(more fanatic news!)

2002-05-29T16:37:00.000-04:00
This would be mighty terrifying. I wonder if anyone thought, "hmm..9/11?!" Regardless, it's going to be pretty weird if some of these people need counseling because of manholes!

Exploding manholes in New York

NEW YORK (CNN) -- A series of underground explosions Wednesday morning in Midtown Manhattan blew manhole covers into the air, shut down rush-hour traffic and halted transit lines.

Overloaded power lines caused the manhole covers to pop, according to Con Edison. No serious injuries were reported, emergency officials said.

Five manhole covers blew off, apparently in three explosions, shutting down traffic from 32nd to 36th streets and between Seventh and Madison avenues, police Lt. Daniel Offman said.

The 34th Street subway station on Sixth Avenue was shut down temporarily, forcing nine subway lines and one train line -- the PATH train between the city and New Jersey -- to bypass it. The station reopened at about 10:35 a.m. EDT.

Three of the manhole covers blew about 50 feet into the air, police and witnesses said.

"There was a very loud explosion. Everyone started running up Sixth Avenue," said Nancy Lauten, a telephone operator. "There was lots of black smoke."

Jittery commuters were pushed from the scene by police; a few were weeping. Traffic was backed up at least 10 blocks north and south...(more!)

2002-05-29T16:20:00.000-04:00
DEAD CELEBRITY/PUBLIC FIGURE

Original Nancy Drew author dead at 96

TOLEDO, Ohio (CNN) -- Millie Benson, the author who captivated generations of young girls with her Nancy Drew mystery books, died Tuesday night. She was 96...(more!)

2002-05-28T23:41:00.000-04:00
Jidohanbaiki (vending machine in Japanese) contain bottles of whiskey, shooters, pornos, sake, mild amphetamines, cold canned coffee, contraceptives and canned sweat

All of the above are items that I have photographs of but I've heard that you can also find:

used school girl panties
nurse caps
new underwear
mobile phones
and fresh steaks.

But the real beauty of a vending machine is the booze. You've got everything needed to have a street party without ever having to go to a bar...

2002-05-28T23:26:00.000-04:00
Arafat Potato Chips Take Egyptian Market by Storm

...CAIRO, Egypt — Cheese-flavored Yasser Arafat potato chips — five cents a bag.

Vendors report brisk sales of the new product. The maker of the chips says it donates five cents — 25 pisaters — to the "Palestinian cause" for every 50 packages sold.

The chips are bagged in Palestinian colors — green, red, black and white — and carry the likeness of a rotund and wide-eyed Arafat, saluting with one hand and holding a Palestinian flag in the other. He's dressed in his trademark military fatigues and black-and-white checked headgear.

Shopkeepers say the Arafat chips, named Abu Ammar — the Palestinian leader's nom de guerre, are considerably outselling another new brand, The Hero, which hit store shelves earlier this month. The packaging for that brand pictures a schoolboy holding a stone in his right hand and books in the other as he confronts an Israeli tank.

"There's no one who doesn't love Abu Ammar," said Iman Mohammed Darwish, a 12-year-old girl. "I like the taste, and I want to help the Palestinians."

"I sell at least three boxes (150 bags) of Abu Ammar daily," said Fatma Abdel-Ghani, a shopkeeper in the Cairo suburb of Thakanat Al-Maadi as she carefully placed boxes of Abu Ammar above those containing The Hero and other brands of chips.

The Israeli-Palestinian conflict that erupted 20 months ago has captivated Egyptians of all social classes and has spawned movies and songs by pop stars in support of Arafat's cause. Most trade and professional unions have collected money, food and medicine for Palestinians.

As newspapers and television broadcasts have been dominated by the conflict, university students staged anti-Israeli demonstrations nearly every day and called on President Hosni Mubarak's government to break diplomatic relations with Israel.

The Arafat brand chips are produced by Al-Jawhara Co. for International Industries. The back of each bag reads: "The more you buy, the more you build."

2002-05-28T23:23:00.000-04:00
As if the Catholic Church doesn't have enough problems, a Pennsylvania priest has created a wrestling web site that would even embarrass Vince McMahon. Featuring hundreds of photos of young men (some of whom are minors) in nothing but clingy Speedos, the so-called Junior Professional Wrestling Association is the brainchild of Rev. Glenn Michael Davidowich, the 38-year-old pastor of St. Michael's Byzantine Catholic Church. Davidowich's web site offers 50 separate videotapes--at $20 a pop--of matches between young men using names like HardKore Kid, David Goliath, Sven, Latin Heat, and Bad Brad (you could be excused for mistaking those monikers for porno star handles).

2002-05-28T23:15:00.000-04:00
SEPT. 11: WHO KNEW WHAT AND WHEN?...Okay, Let me just say this: The same assholes that are accusing Bush of his knowledge of the September 11 attacks are most likely the same dickheads that are infuriated every time a security warning is issued and nothing comes of it. Fuck them...But you all already knew that. Just had to get that out of my system

2002-05-28T20:16:00.000-04:00
Texas executes Beazley
May 28, 2002 Posted: 7:29 PM EDT (2329 GMT)

HUNTSVILLE, Texas (CNN) -- Texas executed confessed killer Napoleon Beazley by lethal injection Tuesday evening for a murder he committed in 1994, when he was 17.

He was pronounced dead at 6:17 p.m. (7:17 p.m. EDT). He did not make a final statement.

Beazley was sentenced to death for the April 1994 killing of 63-year-old John Luttig. Beazley was convicted of shooting Luttig -- whose son is now a federal judge -- twice in the head as he and two friends tried to steal Luttig's Mercedes-Benz from his driveway.

Beazley's attorneys had argued that executing him would violate the Eighth Amendment's provision against cruel and unusual punishment, as well as international treaties on civil and political rights because of his age at the time of the crime. (more of this!)

2002-05-28T17:16:00.000-04:00
Pictures of Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes: A Patriotic Retrospective.

YOU ARE EITHER WITH ME, OR YOU ARE AGAINST ME! DON"T BE A TERRORIST!

...Okay folks, No matter how moral I try to be. I just cannot seen to make it work for more than 5 seconds. I am in no way pleased by the death of the late Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes. However, I am not going to waste a perfect oppurtunity to get people to check out my bullshit. I don't really rely on my own thoughts and rambles within my site. I rely on what I've been able to jack from someone elses site, or off some web search portal. So fuck off. I've been tracking Google search results and have found that the key words that lead to my site are "lisa" "left" "eye" "lopes" "death" "autopsy" etc. I'm doing this because I am doing what America does best. I am observing what the public desires, and I am feeding it to them as much as I can before I am forced to do otherwise. I am doing my patriotic duty. If you disagree, then you are a terrorist. You are either with me, or you are aginst me...Assholes! Anyway, I may just have to permenantly post this on my site to get all you Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes, and all you TLC fans off of my sack. Eat a fat one, or enjoy my site...Don't be a terrorist! Don't be a terrorist...You are with me or aaginst me..Nutsacks! Love, Satan!

********> POSTED ELSEWHERE! <**********

2002-05-28T16:01:00.000-04:00

Texas parole board rejects clemency for Beazley
May 28, 2002 Posted (CNN.COM): 2:08 PM EDT (1808 GMT)

Beazley's execution by lethal injection is scheduled for 7 p.m. EDT Tuesday.

Gerald Garrett, chairman of the Texas Board of Pardons and Paroles, told CNN his board voted 10-7 against commutation to a life sentence, and 13-4 against a temporary reprieve. The votes push Beazley one step closer to death by lethal injection, which is scheduled for tonight.

The pardons board makes recommendations on executions to the governor, who can either accept or reject their advice. In the past 30 years, the board has voted for clemency only once, in 1998.

Beazley, 26, shot John Luttig, 63, twice in the head in April 1994 as he and two friends tried to steal Luttig's Mercedes-Benz from his driveway. ...(read more!)

2002-05-27T21:05:00.000-04:00

WARNING AND DISCLAIMER: This article is NOT a substitute for medical advice and does not constitute the practice of medicine, psychiatry, clinical psychology, clinical social work or any other mental health profession. If you are having trouble urinating, you should always contact a physician since difficulty with voiding can be a symptom of a serious medical condition. We are a group of professional people and people who have suffered with paruresis. We have assembled a board and a board of advisors to help people cope with urinary dysfunction that has a psychological or social origin. In this article, we are NOT practicing medicine, psychiatry, clinical psychology, clinical social work or any other mental health profession. You should have your doctor evaluate your condition before diagnosing yourself, and seek the appropriate necessary mental health counseling if warranted. IPA, Inc. disclaims any and all legal liability whatsoever.

What is a Bashful Bladder?

“Whenever I try to use a public restroom, everything freezes up!”
“No matter how badly I need to go, nothing happens if I’m not at home.”
“I can urinate when I’m alone at home— no problem. But if I’m away at a ball game, someone elses home, or wherever— even if I’m at home and somebody’s over visiting, I can’t pee. This crazy problem has done nothing but interfere with my life!”
These are but a few representative comments of people who experience bashful bladder syndrome (BBS), also referred to as bashful kidneys, pee-phobia, urophobia, psychogenic urinary retention and paruresis (the official clinical term). People with BBS are sometimes referred to as paruretics.
In contrast to physiological conditions like prostatitis (inflammation of the prostate) that block the flow of urine, BBS is a psychological disorder that involves the urinary system. More precisely, BBS is a type of social phobia, meaning the paruretic is usually shy and fears being scrutinized or criticized by others when performing in public— in this case, urinating in a public restroom. The psychological conflict that generates this particular form of social phobia is expressed through the physical symptom of being unable to urinate whenever the person desires.
The experience of BBS varies somewhat from person to person; however, certain general patterns are evident. First, BBS occurs mostly in public restrooms, but it can also occur in the homes of friends and relatives, or even at home if visitors are nearby or a family member is waiting for the paruretic. Typically, though, she or he finds the home bathroom to be the only truly safe toilet— the only place where the paruretic is consistently able to void....(more)

Visit Restrooms.org

2002-05-27T20:47:00.000-04:00
Improve Beach Sex Appeal: Place Beer Cooler Towards South East

LOS ANGELES (Wireless Flash) -- A tight bikini might help you pick up dates on the beach but you'll score even more if your beer cooler faces the southwest.
According to feng shui expert David Cho, keeping an open beer cooler filled with ice on the southwest corner of your towel increases your chances of getting lucky with the opposite sex.

However, don't keep Coke in the cooler. Cho says the red cans will attract freaks and it's better to have drinks that come in white cans.

Another beachin' way to improve sex appeal is to place your umbrella facing east. That improves your decision-making ability -- which is crucial if you meet two potential mates.

Finally, Cho says beach towels should always be solid colors -- white if you're tan and periwinkle if you're pasty white.

2002-05-27T20:39:00.000-04:00
TOP TEN BIBLICAL WAYS TO WAGE WAR AGAINST THE TALIBAN:
Dancing in Taliban Blood: God's 10 Secrets for the Perfect War!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In this age of the secularization (Satanization) of society, America’s 21st century soldiers may not know how God wants them to behave while fighting our enemies. The following are the 10 most prominent Biblical tips for waging a Godly war in the Middle East.

10.AFTER CONQUERING A CITY, IF YOU FIND A DECENT LOOKING WOMAN UNDER ONE OF THOSE BEE KEEPER OUTFITS, MAKE HER YOUR SLAVE.

“And when the Lord thy God hath delivered [a city] into thine hands, thou shalt smite every male thereof with the edge of the sword: But the women, and the little ones, and the cattle, and all that is in the city, even all the spoil thereof, shalt thou take unto thyself” (Deuteronomy 20:13-14).
“And they warred against the Midianites, as the LORD commanded Moses; and they slew all the males. . . . And the children of Israel took all the women of Midian captives, and their little ones, and took the spoil of all their cattle, and all their flocks, and all their goods” (Numbers 31:7-9). (I want More Blood!)

2002-05-27T19:24:00.000-04:00
.::STAR WARS NEWS!::.

Life Sized Satanic Doll Serves As Masturbation Toy For America's Youth

When Mrs. Tawny Huxton opened her son Timmy's bedroom door, she was shocked to see his innocent white hiney nestled into the new 7ft Jar Jar Binks doll she had bought him for his birthday. Lately, many Americans have suffered similar incidents. Young children are being seduced by the character of George Lucas' latest Star Wars Movie. Jar Jar's soothing voice, and timid childlike manners, seem to lure young teens into a world of lustful abandon. Unsuspecting parents purchase the popular life-size doll, only to find out later that it is being used by the child as a masturbation toy.
Under the guise of family entertainment, Lucas' "Star Wars" prequel has contaminated America's youth with subliminal sexual innuendo. Pastor Ebeneezer Smith of the Landover Baptist Church commented, "The demonic characteristics of the Jar Jar binks creature become obvious when one pays close attention. His forked tongue, his lapping, his malignant features, are all too noticeable to the Christ centered man." Experts who have examined the life-sized doll that has become the favorite 'toy' of 12-14 year old children, say that the evidence is overwhelming. The doll was created for the sole purpose of masturbation. It has four openings, and three extrusions, making it compatible for male or female pleasure.
Members of The Landover Baptist Church are outraged at the Satanic subtlety in which marketing geniuses have moved this horrific abomination into the homes of America's youth. "One Mother was concerned that her young daughter was not interested in boys," a Pastor noted, "she asked her little girl, 'why don't you talk about the cute boys at school?' Her daughter replied, 'oh momma, nobody I know is cuter than Jar Jar Binks.' The mother was horrified."
Landover Baptist Church finds that the only way to resolve this problem is to ban not only life sized Jar Jar Binks dolls from American homes, but to ban any life sized doll. "Any child that has seen this movie is finding that their natural attraction to members of the opposite sex is being replaced with an attraction to a 7ft devil with elephant feet, a 25 inch tongue, polka dot skin, a fish snout, and two phallic eyes that jut out like hard erotic pokers. For the Love of God! If you've got this devil in your house, remove it as soon as possible!

2002-05-27T19:11:00.000-04:00

Toymaker under fire as Hitler dolls unveiled

An American doll-maker has sparked controversy by unveiling a line of Nazi figurines.

Mike Fosella has produced Action Man-sized dolls of Adolf Hitler and Joseph Mengele, the concentration camp doctor...

Well, I guesss, I'm fascinated with a whole new realm of artifacts. A few weeks ago I was still going strong on my quest for a baby Jesus Doll of Asian Descent...Well, I'm damn lazy and never found the bitch. Recently, I begun a journey of far more worthless pursuits! I am now looking for weird dolls in general. A) It's more vague, and it is definitely far more easy to do. B) There are countless dolls out there...However, this is not to say I am not on my quest for baby jesus doll from asia! I will find that damn thing if it is the last thing I do...Well I may not. Piss off anyhow.

2002-05-27T18:54:00.000-04:00
PREPARE TO DIE!!!

Remember when you were younger and kids would battle it out with the 99 cent plastic squirt guns that took forever to fill because even though they could only hold 5 oz> of water, the hole to fill them up was the size of a pencil lead? Remember? Well look what the miracle of modern technology has brought us. In just a little bit over a decade, the wussy "squirt" gun has evolved into a piece of equipment for the doomsday of all water fights...The other day, a friend of mine and I were at a local K-Mart, and we found a super soaker bazooka! No shit! The assailant attaches the hydro-weapon to a hose and unleashes a massive water bill on his/her opponent....

The Lineup continues...are you ready for SUPERSOAKER's rapidly developing weaponry? This is the supersoaker to end all wars. The Supersoaker coldwar will be based on this!

2002-05-26T14:46:00.000-04:00

"With approximately 5,000 children born with Down Syndrome in the United States each year, the Down Syndrome Dolls will be an important resource for families who have a child with the condition, or for organizations and medical providers that serve these special youngsters... parents, teachers, and physicians throughout Europe have found the dolls are shared with siblings and friends, they can help foster a better understanding of the human body for children and people with special needs"

2002-05-25T19:13:00.000-04:00
Scientists at Agriculture department of the Hebrew University in Rehovot have genetically engineered a chicken that has no feathers. The naked chicken, as it has been dubbed, is also a low calorie bird because the lack of feathers means the chicken has less fat.

2002-05-25T12:55:00.000-04:00
"Toxic Avenger" by: Lee Harvey mp3

2002-05-25T12:41:00.000-04:00
Vans Warped Tour 2002 Gets Tromatized!!

The Toxic Avenger, Sgt Kabukiman NYPD and the rest of the Troma Team bring Tromaville across North America with the Warped Tour

This Summer, Troma Entertainment, the oldest and longest running truly independent film studio in the world (The Toxic Avenger series, Class of Nuke Em’ High, Tromeo and Juliet, etc.) will be traveling across North America with the Vans Warped Tour, a traveling music, sports and independent art festival (Now in it’s eighth year) June 20th - August 20th, with 48 confirmed stops. At each stop on the Tour, fans will be able to enter “Tromaville”, a section devoted to the Troma Universe created by Troma co-founders Lloyd Kaufman and Michael Herz nearly thirty years ago.

Tromaville, the home of the stars of Troma’s latest film, Citizen Toxie: The Toxic Avenger 4; (In theaters worldwide now) The Toxic Avenger, Sgt Kabukiman NYPD, Dolphinman, The Mad Cowboy; will serve as a beacon of independent art and thought on the Warped Tour. In Tromaville, fans are encouraged to interact and participate with a number of events. Early reports indicate that Tromaville will consist of a stage, screening tent and a number of smaller booths and Tromatic attractions. Below is a portion of what the Troma Team has in-store for Warped ’02;

- A Tromatic Stage Sideshow featuring; Live Performance Artists, a Talk Show and Game Show featuring Various Warped Tour Artists and the Troma Superheroes, Sketch Comedy, the Ultimate Tromette Competition and much more.

- TromaDance Film Festival Screening Series- TromaDance is the first film festival wholeheartedly devoted to filmmakers and fans. There are no entry fees and no admission fees. TromaDance on the Warped Tour may be the first mobile and traveling film festival.

- Make Your Own Damn Movie! - A how-to course on independent filmmaking. Troma Founder and President Lloyd Kaufman will appear on select Warped Tour dates.

- Tromatic Special Effects Demonstrations and Workshops- Learn how to rip someone’s arm off or crush a head for less than $5! (Or less than 1/1000 of Leonardo DeCaprio’s Hair Budget)

- Make a Movie at the Warped Tour- Anyone with a videocamera is invited to shoot something and have it watched that day.

- Give Someone You Love A Massive Head Wound- Much like a traditional face painting booth, except instead of face painting, you can have your skull split open! (With special effects makeup, of course)

When asked to comment on Troma’s involvement in Warped ’02, Lloyd Kaufman stated; “Troma and the Warped Tour share many of the same ideals. We are both active supporters of the independent arts, be it music, films or self-pleasurement. The soundtracks to Troma Films also share many of the bands that fans have grown to love on the Warped Tour, such as NOFX, Bouncing Souls, Less Than Jake, The Hippos, The Lunachicks and too many more to name. Troma and the Warped Tour is a match made in heaven!”

2002-05-25T12:33:00.000-04:00
CASTRATION NEWS UPDATE!!!

Okla. lawmakers back chemical castration
May 25, 2002

OKLAHOMA CITY (AP) -- The Oklahoma legislature has approved legislation that authorizes the chemical castration of serious sex offenders.

The measure, which passed the House on Thursday and had already passed the Senate, permits judges to order chemical castration for people convicted of first- or second-degree rape or forcible sodomy. Repeat offenders could be subject to surgical castration under the bill.

The measure now goes to Gov. Frank Keating for final approval.

In the chemical castration process, drugs are used to reduce the amount of the male hormone testosterone the body produces.

The sponsor, Sen. Frank Shurden, has been trying to get a castration law on the books since the early 1970s. He has said castration has been effective in Europe in reducing recidivism by sex offenders. (cnn.com)

2002-05-25T11:20:00.000-04:00
CODE OF ETHICS/PLEDGE/MISSION STATEMENT

As being a member of the McGuyver fan club you swear to neglect any other issue in your life other than the devotion to McGuyver, or anything McGuyveresque. By doing this, one must a.) Watch every episode of McGuyver humanly possible, b.) Physically force anybody you know to do the same, c.) Make it very apparent of your love of McGuyver by wearing McGuyver memorabilia or by stalking any member of the cast or crew, and d.) if you ever see a potential problem or bad situation, think of the most roundabout way of solving it. This is what McGuyver would do, and therefore it would work and it must be cool.

2002-05-24T19:17:00.000-04:00
An excerpt from:

"Self Circumcision made easy"

...As I gingerly hobbled back into the kitchen for another brew, I spotted IT, the severed hunk-o-foreskin that I had left on the table. It was of fairly good size, about 1/2" by 1/4" and maybe as thick as a piece of bacon. Suddenly, strange thoughts entered my skull, and a raging mental battle between good and evil ensued.

EVIL: "Eat the foreskin."
GOOD: "Don't do it!! That's gross!!"
EVIL: "Eat the foreskin."
GOOD: "Stop thinking about it!!"
EVIL: "You know what you must do. Eat it. It is your destiny."
GOOD: "But that's cannibalism!"
EVIL: "So what?"
GOOD: "Cannibalism is shunned for a reason! It spreads diseases!"
EVIL: "Look dipshit. It's your own fucking flesh. Any diseases in there, you already got."
GOOD: "But it's SELF-cannibalism!"
EVIL: "So is chewing on the piece of skin you bit off your fingertip. BFD."
GOOD: "But this is weird, deranged and perverted!"
EVIL: "Exactly"
GOOD: (Hauls its sorry whupped ass away and shuts up)

So, I ate it. Turns out it was very tough and chewy, kind of like biting a little piece of rubber. I chewed for about 5 minutes, but didn't make any progress on breaking it down, so I swallowed it. It had a little bit of blood flavor at first, but after that it had no flavor at all; rather disappointing in that respect. Maybe I should have cooked it.

2002-05-23T16:45:00.000-04:00
...Once again to Bizarre Magazine, here is a wonderful picture capturing the essence of America's favorite clown!

2002-05-23T14:34:00.000-04:00
Police chief: Levy investigation 'not going to be easy'

...WASHINGTON (CNN) -- One day after the skeletal remains of Chandra Levy were found and nearly 13 months after she vanished, Washington's police chief said no one should expect a quick conclusion to the investigation into the former intern's death.

Investigators, sources said, are looking into whether the Levy case can be connected to two prior assaults on women in the area of the park where the remains were found. A man has been arrested and convicted in connection with those incidents.

Some observers have speculated that Levy might have fallen victim to a serial killer. Several other young women have disappeared from the same area of Washington in recent years, and the murders of two other young women over the past three years remain unsolved...(more at cnn.com)

Well, I'm not sure if this counts. Chandra Levy is not necessarily a celebrity, but she is a public figure. Regardless, Chandra Levy is going to be introduced into the "Dead Celebrities Archive" as the newest and most controversial cadaver.

2002-05-23T00:26:00.000-04:00
ASIA ARGENTO (more stuff..at Bizzare)

...The scarlet diva of Italy’s finest and most controversial horror flicks, reveals all to Billy Chainsaw about her family, her movies and her brush with death

Her father is Italian horror movie maestro Dario (Deep Red, Suspiria, Trauma, Stendhal Syndrome) Argento. Her mother is renowned Italian stage and screen actress Daria Nicolodi. She wrote and published three books between the ages of five and nine, at which point she started her acting career. Her name…? Asia Argento, an incredible individual who recently chose celluloid catharsis as a therapeutic move to avoid self-destruction, by writing, starring in, and directing the nerve-shredding Scarlet Diva. A traumatic, exceptionally personal tale about excess, God and redemption, Scarlet Diva is as emotionally harrowing and visceral as the movie experience gets...(more about Asia Argento with nude pictures...so HOT!)

2002-05-23T00:15:00.000-04:00
***We Want Troma Action Figures!***

View Current Signatures - Sign the Petition

To: Joe Hernandez, Manager of Licensing, McFarlane Toys
For almost two years, toy fans and film fans alike have been asking for action figures based on the popular Troma characters such as The Toxic Avenger®, Sgt. Kabukiman NYPD®, and other characters based on Troma films. Response to this from McFarlane Toys has been: "Well, where's the interest?"

Here it is.

At nearly 30 years of age, Troma Entertainment, Inc. is one of the oldest and most active independent film studios. The Troma brand-name is recognized everywhere from the United States to Tokyo. Critical appreciation has accelerated around the world, with Troma retrospectives sponsored by the Cinematheque Francais, the British Film Institute, and the American Film Institute among others. After creating a new kind of sexy comedy in the 70’s and putting a new face on the movie superhuman hero in the 80’s, Troma continues to break new ground in the 90’s and beyond with quality, entertaining films. For the millennium, The Troma Universe has emerged, and Tromaville has entered the hearts of forward-looking people everywhere.

Troma has also aggressively expanded into the area of licensing and merchandising with the Toxic Avenger character (affectionately known to his fans around the world as Toxie) In addition to four films, Toxie was the star of the Toxic Crusaders animated TV series, which has been broadcast all over the world. More than seventy companies worldwide signed to manufacture products based on Toxie, his TV series, and “The Troma Brand”. Most recently, Lloyd Kaufman has directed Citizen Toxie: The Toxic Avenger 4, which looks to be Troma’s most ambitious film in its history.

In 1991, an action figure line by Playmates Toys based on the extremely popular "Toxic Crusaders" television show was produced and was immensely popular. Our belief is that a new figure line based on the Troma Universe deserves the quality and integrity of the McFarlane name.

We, The Undersigned, are asking that you please consider producing an action figure line based on the Troma characters.

Sincerely,

The Undersigned

2002-05-22T15:40:00.000-04:00

Check out these freaks!

2002-05-21T13:09:00.000-04:00
New Survey Blows The Lid Off Office Toilet Habits

ROSWELL, Ga. (Wireless Flash) -- Working in a cubicle may be hell, but it's still better than the office restroom.
In fact, 92 percent of folks who responded to a recent survey by bathroom tissue manufacturer Kimberly-Clark say when it comes to their company john, they "get in and get out as quickly as possible."

So what does it take to make office bathrooms more tolerable? 26 percent of folks would like magazines and newspapers in the stall, while 12 percent want a manicurist and massage therapist in there instead.

Other bathroom truths revealed include...

-- 5 percent say they've been caught in an office stall without toilet paper and had to "drip dry."

-- One percent say they "rest and take naps" on their company's toilet.

-- And, although most folks think about work on the pot, some think about sex, food or their co-workers.

2002-05-21T13:06:00.000-04:00
Teacher watches as boys shove rod into classmate's sphincter

SENDAI -- A teacher and seven boys from a public junior high school in Miyagi Prefecture face charges after another schoolboy was brutally injured when the students shoved a metal rod into his anus to punish a badminton blunder, police said Tuesday.

Documents accusing the boys, who cannot be named for legal reasons, of inflicting bodily injury and the teacher of negligence resulting in injury have been forwarded to the Sendai District Public Prosecutors Office in connection with the incident that occurred in December last year.

Even now the 16-year-old boy allegedly attacked in the incident cannot function without an artificial anus.

Police said that the victim made a mistake during a game of badminton he was playing on a lunch break on Dec. 20 last year. Four classmates responded by holding him face down on the ground, while another three rammed a 1.6-meter long, 1 centimeter thick metal rod into his sphincter and anus, seriously injuring him.

The 41-year-old teacher accused with the boys was on yard duty at the time and should have been watching what they were doing, but instead sat down eating his lunch. (Mainichi Shimbun, May 21, 2002)

2002-05-20T22:20:00.000-04:00
Parents say kid's thong is just plain wrong
Clothier selling skimpy skivvies for girls 10 and older
By VIKKI ORTIZ
of the Journal Sentinel staff
...

Calling it the "modern-day version of Underoos," a national clothing company is selling thong underwear in children's sizes - with the words "eye candy" and "wink wink" printed on the front.

Abercrombie & Fitch, the same retailer that enraged parents last year with a summer catalog of teenage-looking models groping each other and in the nude, now offers several varieties of thongs at its Abercrombie stores, the division of the company for children 7 to 14 years old.

"It's cute and fun and sweet," said Hampton Carney, spokesman for the company based in New Albany, Ohio.

But some parents are far from tickled. In fact, they're outraged.

"I think of myself as fairly hip, and I think it's just disgusting," said Julie McNamara, a 40-year-old mother from Whitefish Bay.

The thongs, part of Abercrombie's summer line, sell for $7.50, or 3 for $15. Some have stripes, others are solid pink or blue. The solid-colored thongs have the words "eye candy" printed in a little pink heart and "wink wink" in a small green box.

The rearless underwear comes in sizes for girls ages 10 to 16. The smallest size - a medium - appears small enough to fit an even younger girl.

McNamara said she was livid when she stumbled upon the thongs while shopping for her three children at Bayshore Mall. She grabbed a pair and confronted a clerk at the register.

"I said, 'Will you tell me what this is?' They said, 'I know, I know, you're the fourth one today,' " McNamara said.

The flap over the thongs is not the first time that Abercrombie & Fitch has caused controversy for its edgy themes and designs.

Last year, the company caught ire from parents over its quarterly catalog, which was filled with models who appeared to be college age or younger in the nude, kissing and fondling each other.

The company defended its publication, calling it a celebration of a youthful and spirited yet responsible lifestyle....(more underage erotic clothing!?)

2002-05-20T19:19:00.000-04:00
...For some strange clay face jewlery, check out BIGFACE !!

2002-05-19T19:55:00.000-04:00
For all of your athletic jesus needs.....

2002-05-16T08:52:00.000-04:00
Some Light Reading

A couple from Minneapolis decided to go to Florida for a
long weekend to thaw out during one particularly icy winter. Because
both had jobs, they had difficulty coordinating their travel schedules.
It was decided that the husband would fly to Florida on a Thursday, and
his wife would follow him the next day. Upon arriving as planned, the
husband checked into the hotel. There he decided to open his laptop and
send his wife an e-mail back in Minneapolis. However, he accidentally
left off one letter in her address, and sent the e-mail without
realizing his error.

In Houston, a widow had just returned from her husband's funeral. He was
a minister of many years who had been 'called home to glory' following a
heart attack. The widow checked her e-mail, expecting messages from
relatives and friends. Upon reading the first message, she fainted and
fell to the floor. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his
mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:

To: My Loving Wife
From: Your Departed Husband
Subject: I've Arrived!
I've just arrived and have checked in. I see that everything has been
prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then!
Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
(P.S. Sure is hot down here!)

2002-05-15T10:40:00.000-04:00
HOLY COW
Check out Cow hurling fun!!!

2002-05-15T10:15:00.000-04:00

Medicial-Marijuana Advocates Dismiss Government Pot as 'Ditch Weed'

Wednesday, May 15, 2002

SAN JOSE, Calif. — In the world of high-grade marijuana, sticks, seeds and stems are not welcome ingredients.

Medical marijuana researchers said they found such cannabis chaff among pot from a government farm, and say their patients deserve kinder buds.

The government-grown marijuana is being provided to San Mateo County for the first publicly funded analysis of HIV patients smoking the drug at home.

But some of the patients and medical marijuana advocacy groups say the Mississippi-grown weed is weak.(more...at FOX News)

Okay, I guess the war for legalizing Medicinal Marijuana is no longer just about it's availability. Its also about quality. I guess the thought is, "If I'm going to die of a hoorribly debilitating immune disease, I should have the right to smoke really nice shit!" Take what you can assholes, and leave us healthy people alone.

leperskins

Bert and Ernie are Gay! This Movie Proves it.

FUCK, shIt! Blark, Mooo! heewop*twitch* Br0Wnie#

FUCK, shIt! Blark, Mooo! heewoptwitch Br0Wnie#